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Britni TheVadgeWig
I'm Britni, a snarky bitch and generally awesome person. I write about sex, love, and bullshit. If sex-positivity, discussions about BDSM and kink, queer issues, and topics that are completely inappropriate by society's standards make you uncomfortable, then this blog is not for you.
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Category Archives: Sex Miscellany
Why Treat A Sex Worker Like An Actual Human Being When You Can Dehumanize The Shit Out of Them?
I usually really like The Oatmeal. Especially their grammar posters, which I want to own. But they recently published an absolutely appalling cartoon about sex workers. It’s called “5 Super Neat Ways to Use a Hooker.” I should have been called “5 Super Awful Ways to Dehumanize a Sex Worker.” Let’s take a look, shall [...]
Miscommunication
I don’t remember how the conversation started, but The Scientist said something that prompted my head to snap up and say, “I didn’t know you were kinky.” Because our sex had been far from kinky at this point, and I was planning on asking him to be rougher with me the next time we were [...]
Bedroom Talk
Me: “You’d be surprised how many guys would be totally fine forgoing condoms if I didn’t insist on them.” The Scientist: “Not me. I’m diligent about condom use.” Me: “I mean, obviously. You wouldn’t want my various venereal diseases infecting you.” The Scientist: “I know. I don’t know where you’ve been!” Me: “Everywhere.” The Scientist: [...]
Are You Sure?
I had a date with someone the other night that went really well. So well, in fact, that neither of us realized how long we had been in the bar, and I missed the train home. He offered to split my cab fare with me, but it was easily a $40 cab ride and I [...]
My Cervix is Not Male, Thankyouverymuch
A few years ago, I went to the gynecologist at my college’s health center. I had never been to see her before. When it came time for my pap smear, she began to talk to my cervix. “Aw, the little guy’s being shy! He won’t look at me! Look at me, little cervix!” I was [...]
Also posted in Griping and Kvetching and Bitching 7 Comments
Ain’t No Shame
Taylor Momsen seems like a pretty awesome chick. She’s only 16, but seems to know who she is and who she wants to be and doesn’t seem to give a fuck what anyone thinks of her. She rejects the Disney-esque path of innocence and purity that many female teen stars take, and stays true to [...]
Also posted in Culture Goes Pop, Wanking 10 Comments
Fascinating Stuff
I have two new sex ed articles up at Fascinations! One on lube and why it’s awesome, and one on the basics of bondage. Go check them out, plz and thank you! You can see all my articles here. And you should definitely check out the complete collection of sex ed articles, because there’s some [...]
Putting the Sex into a Sexless Story
Salon posted the 10 most baffling Twilight products, and a Tantus dildo was one of the products listed. And it’s true, Tantus does have a dildo inspired by Twilight. But it’s not the one that Salon thinks! “Twilight” is the color of this dildo (the O2 Niagara). It also comes in “Ice” (blue) and “Candy” [...]
Also posted in Population Control and Orgasmic Artillery 5 Comments
Euphemisms
There are all kinds of euphemisms for things. Especially sexual things. Because we’ve made sex this dirty, taboo thing, we need words for things that don’t evoke those embarrassing images and reactions! “Vajajay.” “Down there.” “Member.” “Love making.” But apparently, the numerous euphemisms that already exist for sexytime were not good enough. Glamour had to [...]
Also posted in Griping and Kvetching and Bitching, Mag Mocking, Sexuality 35 Comments
How to Guarantee That I Will Never Sleep With You Again