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Britni TheVadgeWig
I'm Britni, a snarky bitch and generally awesome person. I write about sex, love, and bullshit. If sex-positivity, discussions about BDSM and kink, queer issues, and topics that are completely inappropriate by society's standards make you uncomfortable, then this blog is not for you.
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Category Archives: Mag Mocking
Women Are Crazy Bitches Who Just Want to Use You For Your Sperm
Men, beware! There is a predator on the prowl, and she’s only after one thing: YOUR SPERM. Forget wanting a relationship or sex or friendship with you. Nope, she just wants your sperm to fertilize her egg because all women are BABY CRAZY and only have one thing on their minds: HAVING BEBEHS. Luckily, Ask [...]
Also posted in Griping and Kvetching and Bitching 16 Comments
Euphemisms
There are all kinds of euphemisms for things. Especially sexual things. Because we’ve made sex this dirty, taboo thing, we need words for things that don’t evoke those embarrassing images and reactions! “Vajajay.” “Down there.” “Member.” “Love making.” But apparently, the numerous euphemisms that already exist for sexytime were not good enough. Glamour had to [...]
Also posted in Griping and Kvetching and Bitching, Sex Miscellany, Sexuality 36 Comments
14 Sex Moves You’ll Wish You’d Still Never Heard Of
My masochism (and awesome blog fodder) continues as I peruse the Cosmo website a little more. This time, it’s “14 Sex Moves You’ve Never Heard Of.” Let me just preface this by saying: there’s a reason you have never heard of these sex moves. And that reason is that they are the worst ideas I’ve [...]
Also posted in Griping and Kvetching and Bitching, Sex Miscellany 18 Comments
Wisdom: Cosmo Style
Let’s check in with Cosmo for some beauty advice, shall we? I almost don’t have anything to say about this, except that I will never, ever wear the combined scent of lavender and pumpkin pie. Not just because that sounds like the grossest odor I’ve ever heard, but I don’t really want to be increasing [...]
Also posted in Griping and Kvetching and Bitching, Standards of Beauty 8 Comments
Sexy: For His Pleasure!
It’s no surprise that Cosmo is a piece of shit. I mean, really. We know it’s misleading and ridiculous. But because I am a masochist and enjoy *headdesk*ing, I was compelled to visit their website. The first article that pops up? “20 Dresses Guys Want You To Wear This Spring.” Not “20 Dresses to Make [...]
Carrie Bradshaw, Feminist? Not So Much
Last week, Glamour had a feature that showcased celebrities dressed up as (female) “American Icons.” Overall, it was a fun little photoshoot. However, I had a problem with the blurb that accompanied the picture of Emma Stone as Carrie Bradshaw. It said (bold emphasis mine): “Have we ever seen a more obsessed fashionista than Sex [...]
Also posted in Caterwauling About The Patriarchy, Culture Goes Pop 7 Comments
I Bet Amanda Bynes Reads “Cosmo”