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Britni TheVadgeWig
I'm Britni, a snarky bitch and generally awesome person. I write about sex, love, and bullshit. If sex-positivity, discussions about BDSM and kink, queer issues, and topics that are completely inappropriate by society's standards make you uncomfortable, then this blog is not for you.
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Category Archives: Awesomeness
Girlfriend of the Year
Upon learning that Alex Rodriguez has multiple paintings of himself as a centaur in his home, Jesus decided that he, too, needed one. As a gift to him for various things including getting off heroin and generally being awesome, I commissioned a painting from a good friend of ours. Behold: You’ll have to trust me [...]
Mercy
I want to get these. They are the perfect way to end an argument, if you ask me. Simple, to the point, and cute as hell.
Also posted in I Am A Material Girl, Relationships 2 Comments
Talking in His Sleep
Jesus, in his sleep: “And he goes up for the ball! That was a basketball metaphor. I make basketball metaphors.” Good to know. But he doesn’t even like basketball!
This Is Why We’re Dating
Something I posted on Jesus’ wall: And yes, that one person that likes his comment is me.
30
Tonight, I’m taking Jesus to dinner to celebrate 30 days without heroin. I’m so proud of him, and he says he’s feeling better than he has in a long time. I know we’ve still got an uphill battle, but we can only take it one step and one day at a time. My recovery program [...]
My Boyfriend is Better Than Yours
Random text from Jesus: Dear creatures/beings/entities/spiritual forces to whom I give thanks: Thank you for blessing me with a girlfriend who likes to cuddle, make me laugh, has perfect tits and can suck cock like a porn star. That might be the nicest thing anyone’s ever said to me. And it totally made my night, [...]
How My Day Started…
My alarm didn’t go off, so I was late and had to take a cab. My cab driver hit a chick on a bike, so I had to take a different cab halfway there. My new cabbie was listening to Rush Limbough, who I listened to read the headline “Gay Porn Star Accused of Killing [...]
Posted in Awesomeness 8 Comments
Sweet Nothings
Jesus: “I want to have a blowout dinner for my birthday. Will you be my date?” Me: “Fuck no.” Jesus: “Will you be my bitch?” Me: “Sure.” Jesus: “Will you be my cumslut?” Me: “Absolutely.” I like that he knows me already.
Why I Love Dan Savage
To follow up on my “Dan Savage Fail” post, I figured I’d post AWESOME DAN SAVAGE. Not necessarily in the form of great advice, but more along the lines of AWESOME PERSON stuff. In a Word… I have a serious cum fetish. I work odd hours, and my husband often watches porn and masturbates, which [...]
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My Friends Are Better Than Yours