Size Matters (Except That It Doesn’t. And Shouldn’t)

I came across this post on a forum recently (lovely grammar and spelling are hers):

“SMALL PENIS… are SOOO much better than large penis’

or so think some morons online HA!!!!

I was browsing online trying to find out why my [boyfriend's] dick is tiny but his dads was deliciously large, and tumbled upon a site which encourages small penis losers to support eachother and feel good about their lack of masculinity.. wtf. (yea im not posting the site because im boycotting it and u losers will probably go on their and think its okay to have a clit for a dick)

some of these morons had the nerve to say “some women PREFER a small penis as a large one can hit their cervix and cause them pain” HAHAHAHAH what a bloody JOKE!

another reason having as mall penis is good? ” a woman can fit the whole thing in her mouth” LOL haha and about 3 baseballs along with it.. fucking faggots.

go fuck eachother then.”

And we should be surprised that some men may refuse to wear condoms because they are embarrassed that they’re too small for them? Women are insecure about their weight, the size of their breasts, or the appearance of their vaginas, because of societal standards of beauty that are imposed on them. But what about men?

In this society, masculinity is often linked to penis size. Men brag about having a big dick, and it’s seen as a source of pride, and an indication of their sexual prowess. But the thing is, dick size is totally unimportant, and is most definitely not an indication of how much of a “man” someone is.

Yes, we all have our preferences when it comes to sex and body types. Some women *do* prefer larger penises. But many don’t. Like me. I don’t need a giant cock ripping me in half. In fact, bigger is often more painful for me. I’ve also found that many less endowed men actually try harder in bed, because they feel like they have something to prove. They tend to be more considerate lovers. Guys that are well endowed so often rely solely on the size of their dick to please their lovers that they feel like they don’t have to put the effort in elsewhere. And often, they can be bigger dicks both literally and figuratively. Granted, these are all generalizations, but the point I’m trying to make is that size doesn’t matter.

It’s awful that so many men feel embarrassed or ashamed for not having 7 inch dicks. However, we do equate bigger with better in this society. Take the dating site Not only can men under 7 inches not be on the site, but the name of the site is “7 or better,” not “7 or longer” or “7 or larger,” implying that bigger is better.  But men shouldn’t be shamed for having a small or less than average or average penis. The size of their dick isn’t indicative of their sexual prowess, their masculinity, or anything at all.

It’s not just women that have unrealistic standards of beauty to live up to, and it’s important to remember that, sometimes, it does work both ways.

This entry was posted in Griping and Kvetching and Bitching, Sex Miscellany, Standards of Beauty. Bookmark the permalink. Post a comment or leave a trackback: Trackback URL.


  1. Red
    Posted February 16, 2010 at 10:29 pm | Permalink

    There seems to be a bit of debate between experts as to what the average penis size (when erect) in the US actually is. According to the Kinsey Institute (, the most recent data puts average length between 5 and 6 inches.

    I prefer my men at around 6.5 – 7 inches because otherwise rough sex HURTS.

    This girl is not only grammatically challenged, she's also ignorant. I feel bad for any man who sleeps with her because she obviously judges and berates her lovers. Masculinity is not tied to dick length any more than femininity is tied to breast size.

    Ugh. Idiot.

  2. SevurdLove
    Posted February 16, 2010 at 10:55 pm | Permalink

    I was told by the first woman I ever had sex with that I was below average and just went with that. I was fine. If I couldn't do well with my penis I learned to be better with hands, emotions, and movements. After dating 3 guys it struck me that that wasn't true, she was saying it so I wouldn't leave her, I am a bit above average, but not too large… I don't think it phased me, but did explain some things. I have never measured. I don't want to know and don't care. But I am extremely surprised by the number of men and women who push stereotypes like this to an extreme… it is extremely sickening.

    Since we are discussing. I am fine with an average penis. That isn't what interests me in the first place.

  3. Sulpicia
    Posted February 16, 2010 at 11:10 pm | Permalink

    Penis – gorgeous. They just don't all fit the right way. Which should have nothing to do with individual penis size. I'm not perfect for every man. Not every man is perfect for me. That certainly upset me — the quote, that is. (And that's just on a physical level.)

  4. CarynSKA
    Posted February 16, 2010 at 11:40 pm | Permalink

    Yeah… I actually stumbled across a site that was trying to scientifically 'prove' that all women like bigger penises. It made me sad, but it was kind of, almost funny in how wrong they were.
    All I know about it is I'm a small girl, I can see how some sizes would be too big for me. But too small? I don't think so. It doesn't matter, as long as pain isn't involved I'm happy.

  5. Phallicity
    Posted February 17, 2010 at 6:17 am | Permalink

    I think it's true that penis size matters much more to men than to women. Being an attentive lover, asking questions, taking queues and learning your partner is what leads to great sex, not wailing on some poor women with your gigantic penis.

    At the same time, some women do prefer larger penises, whether it be longer or thicker. I've always been fairly cocky (forgive the pun) however I'm pretty average in size. I'm comfortable with myself (most of the time) to the point where if my wife wants to try something bigger than me, I have no problem wearing a strap-on to meet her size and\or shape desires. For most men, however, I think such a notion would make them feel insufficient. It would be similar to asking a woman to get breast implants (except implants are a somewhat permanent and sometimes painfully complicated procedure.. I really only use this as a loose comparison).

    Maybe the OP is simply too immature, as her sentence structure and grammatical errors lead me to believe. She's only shortchanging herself in the end, but I feel sorry for any poor cock-owner stuck in a relationship with her. =p

  6. nuclearrainbow
    Posted February 17, 2010 at 2:49 pm | Permalink

    You so get points for knowing an using xkcd!

    And penis-size, meh. People like that really don't help, because there are too many guys insecure about their penis, while they have absolutely no reason for that. Also, guys seem to overestimate average penis-size, that does not help either.

    /Nuclear Rainbow

  7. alana
    Posted February 17, 2010 at 3:01 pm | Permalink

    I definitely feel for men who have insecurities about their penis size (at least they don’t have to worry it smells wrong too though), but sexual health should always come first. While this is a perfect example of how the patriarchy’s two dimensional idea of masculine/feminine hurts both men and women, I still can’t believe some men would remove or refuse condoms because of those insecurities. That’s just disgusting.

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    [...] only do I not care how big your penis is, I a) shouldn’t know anything about it before I’ve actually [...]

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