I Think His Tractor’s Sexy

As we all know, I spend a lot of time talking to people on GChat. Especially Molls. She is my bestest GChat friend.

me: i am trying to myspace stalk my newest conquest
Molls: nice
me: i know that he is friends witha mutual friend who doesnt have a private profile
me: so i am being creepy
me: though i do have this guys number, but he cant get texts and i like texts
Molls: ghey
me: this man is very hard to find
me: i do not likey
me: ha i got him
me: he had a baby picture up
me: the fucker
Molls: hahahahhahaha
me: haha although, i may have to NOT fuck that based on his about me section
me: it mentions being catholic, republican, and his relationship with god
me: also, that he looooves mccain
me: i wonder if god would want him to tie me to a bed and fuck me
me: beause i want to pull on his chest hair
Molls: nope
me: hey… i almost took him home last night
me: then his ex showed up and ruined everything
Molls: look whaat happens when god intervens
me: oh no. his groups include george strait lovers, george w. bush, and jeff gordon fans. and garth brooks’ friends in low places
me: this is amazing
Molls: oh man
me: hahahahaha
me: is it wrong that it makes me want to so much more?
me: like, i dont think i have ever done a cowboy
me: he can keep the hat on
me: and use his lasso to tie me into fun positions. i KNEW he would be down for tying me up!
me: plus, i could check “cowboy” off my list of kinds of people to do

I will let y’all know how it goes.
This entry was posted in Awesomeness, Sex Miscellany, With A Little Help From My Friends and tagged . Bookmark the permalink. Post a comment or leave a trackback: Trackback URL.


  1. twg
    Posted September 3, 2008 at 9:52 am | Permalink

    See, I just don't fuck republicans. Or, failing that, no social conservatives, at least.

    I would also argue that Kenny Chesney, who wrote the titular song … well, the tractor would be the ONLY thing about him that ever, ever could be sexy, as he is gross.

  2. Osbasso
    Posted September 3, 2008 at 1:17 pm | Permalink

    At least you're working on "y'all". Gotta speak cowboy if you're going to do cowboy!

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