I am a huge fan of the booty call. What this means is that I love having a person or persons that I can call at closing time knowing that we can go home together and fuck. I love to have someone that I can text on a weeknight to watch TV with, eat some pizza, and fuck like bunnies. What this does not mean is that I will answer every single text I receive later than 1 AM. Just because you make the booty call and know that I am a fan of the booty call does not mean that YOUR booty call will work. In fact, chances are that it will not. I am selective about the people I sleep with (believe it or not) and not everyone will get to pass go and collect $200. There are several kinds of booty calls that I will not respond to.
- Do not booty call me if you have a girlfriend. Especially if I know that you have a girlfriend. I have very few standards and hard limits, but one of them is that I do not do guys with girlfriends. I will not help you cheat on your significant other. There are plenty of girls out there that will, but having been the scorned woman and knowing how it feels, I cannot facilitate the fucking over of someone else.
- Do not booty call me if I am in a relationship. Especially if I’ve told you that I am in a relationship. Once is understandable, especially if we used to fuck, but once I’ve made it clear that I am dating someone, you need to stop. It never looks good when you are in bed with your significant other and your phone goes off at 3 AM. Never.
- Do not booty call me if we are very good friends and I have turned you down in the past. I stated that we are friends and friends only for a reason. It’s because I don’t want to fuck you. So please, don’t even try.
- Do not booty call me if we never hang out except for when you want to fuck. I have spoken about this before. I don’t mind having a sexual and not emotional relationship with someone, but if you’re gonna fuck me, you’d better at least be cool with getting drinks or something beforehand. If you don’t want to be seen in public with me or spend any time in my company when I am fully clothed, then I don’t want to fuck you. Also, when you have repeatedly told me that you don’t want just sex from me, but then only call me once every other week at midnight or later, your actions are speaking loud and clear and you will not get booty from me.
- Do not booty call me if you are or have been hooking up with one of my friends. That’s just not cool, dude.
- Do not booty call me if we have never hooked up before. That is VERY presumptuous of you to assume that I even want to hook up with you, especially randomly with no strings attached at 4 AM on a Thursday. Make sure that you at least know that I’m down with getting down with you before you call me and ask for it.
What are your booty call deal breakers?
I'm Britni, a snarky bitch and generally awesome person. I write about sex, love, and bullshit. If sex-positivity, discussions about BDSM and kink, queer issues, and topics that are completely inappropriate by society's standards make you uncomfortable, then this blog is not for you.
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14 Comments
I'm right there with ya on the gf thing. I, too, have been the scorned woman. I won't even respect friends who are knowingly helping guys (or girls!!) cheat. blech.
Question…does your current relationship with The Bruiser kinda resemble rule #4? Of course, I don't know and totally correct me if my assumptions are wwaaaayyyy off.
<3 you!
It could, but we don't call each other for sex. It only happens if we end up hanging out at the same place at the same time. So, while we're only alone together when fucking, it's not necessarily planned like that. It's more of a hey, you're here, I'm here, we're both still up and down to keep partying, let's go kind of thing.
These are good rules. I don't make booty calls anymore but when I did, one of my rules was: No BC if you are an ex and you treated me like shit when we dated. Learned my lesson after I dated one guy for a year. He cheated and was kind of an ass in general, we broke up, and had multiple BC before I found out that he had told mutual friends that I faked being pregnant to stay together. Barf.
#4 is a big one. I don't do the booty calls so much anymore because honestly I am just too lazy to get my ass out of bed.
I think my biggest bc pet peeve is booty call denial syndrome. Like when a dude calls you at 3am, but refuses to admit that it's a booty call- because he's too good of a guy for that sort of thing. EW.
Just because you make the booty call and know that I am a fan of the booty call does not mean that YOUR booty call will work….
Hell if a booty call works everytime it isnt a booty call its a relationship.
being a guy I can't imagine turning down any booty calls, if the chick turned me on of course.
Miss Robyn – I hate that male denial thing in general. "No, I didn't flake on you, because I am reliable". Dood. You flaked. You booty-called. Admit to it!
I used to do more booty calls when I was in my early 20s. Now, only if I am climbing the walls horny and can convince myself it's a good idea.
Oddly enough, I don't make the booty calls. I feel like a creep when I'm doing it.
The only thing I care about in the booty call is that if you call me and you want to hang out, we better fuck. If we don't then there was no point.
You'll cheat on whoever with a booty call.. but you won't do a dude with a girlfriend?
I love it. <3
You'll cheat on whoever with a booty call.. but you won't do a dude with a girlfriend?
When did I ever mention cheating on people with booty calls?
I’m in a relationship now, but when I was single I didn’t get into the whole booty call thing. I usually just ended up sleeping with people I hung out with casually.
Probably not the best solution. lol
Yeah. I need to learn how to read.
Sorry.
So you don't fuck dudes with girlfriends, or accept the booty calls when you have a boyfriend/girlfriend?
That makes sense. Maybe I should start that.
It's a good method. If I'm in an open relationship, that's totally different because then it isn't cheating. But if we've agreed to be exclusive, I *try* not to cheat.
I've never had a booty call.
*shocking*
…
TPH, I'm not shocked. I could have guessed that.
Though people that don't know you may be shocked.
I disagree with "Do not booty call me if we never hang out except for when you want to fuck." Those are the only booty calls I will accept, actually. I have enough friends. And you are not my bf. I compartmentalize.