Here are two recipes that I have recently come across that you can enjoy with your family this Thanksgiving. Don’t say I never shared anything worthwhile with you!
First up is Testicle Pizza from The Testicle Cookbook:
You will need:
- Bull’s testicles
- A few rashers bacon, streaky, finely chopped
- Fresh pepper, finely chopped
- Onion, finely sliced
- 100 g cheddar cheese
- Black pepper, ground
- Ham, rolled
- 1 egg
- 2-3 tablespoons of tomato puree
- Oil
- Start with rubbing pizza-flattened dough with oil and pour over with Tomato Puree
- Bake it for about 5 minutes
- Top the pizza with finely chopped bacon, fresh pepper, onion, milled black pepper, rolled ham, grated Cheddar cheese, and sliced testicles (in that order)
- Break an egg and top it in the middle of pizza.
- Put it back into oven and bake for another 5-8 minutes at 225 degrees.
Tip: Make sure the rolled ham is laid under cheese. For an extra kick use spicy tomato sauce.
Note: Testicles must be marinated overnight. The marinade sauce should consist of 2/3 water, 1/3 vinegar, bay leaf, and peppercorn.
The second, for Creamy Cum Crepes, is from the book Natural Harvest: A Collection of Semen-Based Recipes:
For the crepes, you will need:
- 3 eggs
- 1 cup of flour
- 1 cup of milk
- 1/2 a teaspoon of salt
- 2 tablespoons of melted butter
For the filling, you will need:
- 1/2 cup of cottage cheese
- 2 tablespoons of semen
- 1/3 cup of melted butter
- 1/4 cup powdered sugar
- Blend all ingredients for the crepes together until smooth.
- Melt a small piece of butter in a hot skillet.
- Pour a small amount of batter on the pan while swirling it to distribute the batter evenly and make a thin crepe.
- Let it cook a few seconds until golden brown and then flip to brown the other side.
- Whisk together the powdered sugar and melted butter.
- Fold in the cottage cheese and semen.
- Spoon the filling into the crepes and serve right away.
Happy holidays and enjoy the delicious food!
I'm Britni, a snarky bitch and generally awesome person. I write about sex, love, and bullshit. If sex-positivity, discussions about BDSM and kink, queer issues, and topics that are completely inappropriate by society's standards make you uncomfortable, then this blog is not for you.
Good Vibes 
3 Comments
You have issues. Love you anyway…but seriously…issues.
Re: the balls, there is a reason I stopped eating meat. Thanks for reminding me:) Also, I just realized that I haven't tasted come in two years. And I'm sad:(
The cum crepes actually look good, but the testicle pizza….not so much.