So, Too Faced, a makeup brand, has a new kit that you can buy. The Walk of Shame Set. From the website:
What it is:
An all-you-need overnight survival kit to plan for those spontaneous dusk-till-dawn rendezvous!What it does:
The Walk Of Shame set will get you out the door and walking home without the shame (hot shower and excuses not included)! This exclusive compact features products that correct and set your complexion, as well as two exclusive eyeshadows and the perfect bronzer to get you glowing at all hours.This set contains:
- Mini Primed & Poreless Face Primer (colorless application)
- Exclusive Compact with Shadows/Bronzer
- Shadow Insurance Eye Shadow Primer (colorless application)
- Lip of Luxury Lipstick in Totally Nude
- Too Faced Toothbrush
- Oral Fixation Mints
Yes, because walking home after spending the night with someone is soooo shameful! ESPECIALLY if you *look* like you’re just coming back from a night out. How embarrassing! But do you know what fixes everything? Makeup! Makeup designed to make you look like you’re not wearing any, because it’s “colorless” or “totally nude” (how much do you want to bet that it’s only “totally nude” if you’re Caucasian?). Also, if you have this kit with you, doesn’t that imply that you planned to spend the night out? Where’s the shame in knowing you’ll be spending the night elsewhere and being prepared for the next morning?
How about you rename this kit something less slut-shaming? How about “Walk of ‘Motherfuckers, I Just Got Laid!’” Or “Walk of ‘I’m a Sexually Liberated Woman, Thankyouverymuch’?” Or “Walk of ‘Where I Spent the Night is None of Your Goddamn Business’?” Because I’m way over the practice of telling women that spending the night with someone is something to be ashamed of.
I'm Britni, a snarky bitch and generally awesome person. I write about sex, love, and bullshit. If sex-positivity, discussions about BDSM and kink, queer issues, and topics that are completely inappropriate by society's standards make you uncomfortable, then this blog is not for you.
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19 Comments
See, I only want a kit that makes me look like the traditional walk of shame. Dark raccoon eye circles, smudgey lipstick stains and a dewy glow of pure satisfaction. None of this “hide the sluttiness” business.
I’m partial to “Walk of ‘Motherfuckers, I Just Got Laid!’” myself.
I can’t believe this is a real product. Actually, yes I can. Sigh.
I have a “Walk Of Shame” bag, though I don’t call it that. I call it an “over night bag.” Because that’s what it is.
Mine has: Face wipes, face lotion, baby wipes, hair ties, a brush, gum, deodorant, chapstick, condoms, and some Advil. I have also been known to throw leggings, a tee shirt, and flip flops into my bag if I’m going out.
Basically so I can leave where I am the next morning and look somewhat presentable.
Oddly enough, I’ve used it way more times when crashing at my gay male best friends house after way too many drinks.
If I know I’ll be sleeping out, I put a bag in my car. Change of clothes, toothbrush. When The Bruiser and I were regularly hooking up but never planning it, I always had a bag in my car. I always have a small deodorant, condoms, and my important meds in my purse, in case of unexpected nights out.
I would SO BUY a kit named “Motherfuckers, I just got laid!”.
But then, I’d include means of safer sex (condoms and lube), toothbrush and toothpaste, a mild facial cleanser and a pair of panties (I don’t fancy walking home in my bodily-fluids-encrusted ones).
Seriously – you don’t correct fucked up (pun intended) make up by adding even more. As a rule of thumb, getting it off your face first helps a lot. Also, shove the slut shaming. kthxbye.
Oh man, even worse than the ones covered in dried bodily fluids are the ones you have to put back on directly after hooking up and they’re still sopping wet. I *hate* walking around in soaked panties.
Oh yes. Sooooo disgusting. You put them back on and they are wet and cold and eeeew. Especially if you wear tight jeans. *shudder*
you could always leave them as a souvenir for him (or her!) and go commando On your “Walk of shut the fuck up!”. This whole post made me giggle..:)
I’m always partial to “Stride of Pride”.
One of my boyfriend’s best frinds gave him some ribbign after completing a “Walk of Shame” after spending the night with me. He ponted out that he walked back at 8 AM on a saturday, and was wearing a suit. Not exactly ASDF SHAMEFUL.
Oh, it’s wrong on so many levels! And not only is it wrong and shocking that someone thought that all of this was a good and appealing idea, but the content is also fucking boring! I’m not dragging around a ton of beige make-up when I’m going out!!
This product = EPIC FAIL. But your post title and last paragraph = EPIC WIN, so I am pleased.
I like “Walk of Fame.”
I love the idea of ‘Stride of Pride’! This would be good if it didn’t have such a shit name. The fact that they’re creating something like this obviously means they’re accepting that there is a market of girls who do spend nights out and the product itself is not the problem – mini make-up = win. I love mini stuff. It’s the branding that’s the problem (as you pointed out in a much wittier way than I can!). It’d be a good ‘Dragon’s Den’ product (if you guys have that show over there?) – a kit for a hook-up that fits into a handbag – condoms, face wipes, make up, deodorant etc. But you know, without all the slut-shaming.
xoxox
http://www.qwantz.com/index.php?comic=1734
This recent Dinosaur Comics strip about Walks of Shame cracked me up… I completely agree, we need to erase shame from our vocabulary when it comes to sex! I personally really enjoy walking across campus in the clothes from the night before. I like scandalizing people, and I don’t care who knows that I’m hooking up (or guesses, rather, since there are plenty of times when I just fall asleep in a friend’s bed after movie night).
This comic is so full of win, I can’t even start to comprehend all of it’s awesomeness.
Speaking of which, zomg BALONEY SANDWICHES! I’m so gonna use that in the future. Any cussing with foods involved is a win in my book.
“Walk of Shut the Fuck Up”
Yep, that. The whole “walk of shame” nonsense needs to stop. Now-ish. I like all the alternate names you listed, particularly “Walk of ‘Motherfuckers, I Just Got Laid!’” I mean, last I checked, adults were allowed to have sex with each other. Or sleep at other people’s houses. Or both. (nothing horribly devious there) And I’m pretty sure women count as adults, though it seems a lot of people don’t like that idea.
Can I just say how this post is full of win? ’cause it’s full of win. And I completely agree – slut-shaming, how perfectly patriarchical! Fuck that.
This is why I lurrvvee your blog… seriously.
“Walk of Shut the Fuck Up” and “Walk of ‘Motherfuckers, I Just Got Laid!’” are both the awesome brilliance!
Ferns
I remember one of the nights I spent at my partner’s house when we hadn’t been dating for a while and the next morning I didn’t have much to wear in the morning and I had to get ready for work. I had to borrow a pair of my partner’s elastic waistband shorts just so I would have something else to wear. When I went into work, one of the younger co-workers commented to me about what I was wearing. I just said that I had to stay at a friends house and I didn’t get a chance to pack clothes.” and she said back “Uh huh, well I wouldn’t go around telling people that myself.” and I said “I don’t see why, I don’t have anything to be ashamed of” and she said “Well, I would.” and I said “I don’t.” and that was that.
So as you can tell, I agree with your post.