1 Vs. 100

In our society, there is a stigma about the number of partners someone (especially a woman) has had. So many women are afraid to be sexual or to admit that they have been with a certain number of people because that somehow makes them “dirty,” “damaged,” or “slutty.”

However, I don’t see how it is anybody else’s business how many people I have slept with. As long as two adults are consenting, respect each other, and are safe about it, what the hell does it matter? If I am safe and clean of all STDs (and even if I’m not, some STDs can be passed even while using condoms), how would the number of penises (penii?) that have been inside me matter? I think that the only thing that you should be obligated to disclose to someone before sleeping with them is whether or not you have an STD.
If someone asks me how many people I have been with, I always ask them why it matters. Would it change the way they felt about me if the answer was above a certain number? If the answer if yes, then they don’t like me or respect me enough to be sleeping with me, anyway.
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5 Comments

  1. Jake lara
    Posted August 27, 2008 at 10:06 pm | Permalink

    Hi,
    The male libido likes a virgin best so you just imagine your with a virgin :) Our conscious mind can fool our libido's ( the male libido is turned on as much by a photograph as it is by looking at someone for real ) If your unable to use your imagination to fool your libido and if the male libido is in charge of a guy rather than the other way round with the guy in charge of his libido he can be a jerk.

  2. Britni TheVadgeWig
    Posted August 27, 2008 at 11:56 pm | Permalink

    Jake: So are you trying to say that it matters how many people I have been with because guys have this virgin fantasy of sorts and they don't want that tarnished?

    Why the hell would anyone want to be with a virgin? It is awkward, painful, and the girl is going to be inexperienced and clueless, hence: BORING. Virgins are overrated as hell, if you ask me.

  3. twg
    Posted August 28, 2008 at 9:05 am | Permalink

    Jake, come on. Guys don't want to sleep with virgins, some of them are just so insecure that they don't want to imagine that their girlfriend is and was a sexual being before they came around. If you want someone who's good in bed, they have to have practiced somewhere. Quit whining and enjoy your expert BJ.

  4. Jake lara
    Posted August 28, 2008 at 2:46 pm | Permalink

    Yes of course she is a was a sexual being and sorry I forget I haven't written much about myself in my blog, if thats what you can call it :) so people are gonna jump to conclusions. I'm a feminist and I do believe very strongly that women should get respect and kudos when they express their sexuality as men do and get respect for being sexual beings. How many people you've slept with isn't a negative issue to me, Im just showing you the cause of the problem many men can have that you complained about in your blog and it's short term solution. and I'm being honest. Sexual desire isn't rooted in the conscious mind, The libido is part of the subconscious and you can't decide to have an erection as you would move your arm and you certainly can't fake one :) you have to hope that the views you hold about sexuality filter into your libido via your subconscious which can happen but usually takes a long time, but your libido can be fooled immediately with fantasy, admittedly it's better if the fantasy is mutual as with BDSM but people who've been married a long time superimpose fantasies on their love making, and most people know the difference between reality and fantasy, in fact some peoples sexual fantasy isn't even humanly possible :) Lol

  5. TaniaNo Gravatar
    Posted April 13, 2010 at 4:12 am | Permalink

    You know, I’ve noticed that even if a guy claims not to care who you’ve been with before him, he’ll always have a line- some draw that line a bit higher than others, but it’s still there. And most of the time, although there are, pleasantly, a few exceptions, if it’s more than them, they can’t handle it.

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