Drunk Texting With Jess Manifesto: NYSBCP Edition

By Britni TheVadgeWig | Published: October 2, 2010

While at the Calendar Party, I received a drunk text from Jess Manifesto. I was SO EXCITED, since other people got to experience the wonder of Jess’ texts. It was an interactive event (all links added by me, obvi).

Jess: Beteuni!!!!!!

Jess: Inbat a wessj h!

Jess: Wedding drunk fun knens head!

Me: I’m at the calendar party!

Jess: IMP hats awaneakne. You should smooi h essin em :)

Me: Other people want to say hi.

My phone: Hi jess I’m garnet how are you

Jess: Omg go garnet!

Jess: I live me sime garnet!!!

My phone: Hey jess! You’re my hero!

Jess: Yay! LEDs be best grinds!

Jess: Gatbr y bad britnii are y new mvyu reje da ever!!!!!

Me: Oh, that was outspoken clitic [that called you her hero]!

Jess: Yes!!!! Unlicensed get!

Jess: Let smke Rain to whey Elbe!

Jess: Bbooobies like wowowow

Jess: I gavn and I mm drhknat a weddkg. Fixj marriages

At this point, I walked over to Jiz Lee and explained this little blog feature, told them that Jess was the girl that made the comic of Billy Castro fingering them, and asked if they would say hi.

My phone: Hi OMG I fucking loved that pic of me being fisted and squirting all over Billy Castro Xx Jiz

Jess: Omg!!!!!!!!!

Jess: Jizz. j jiz3: in pants just ow.

Jess: Best datif my life eve.

My phone: Hi, it’s @badbadgirlx

My phone: And Essin’ Em

My phone: Kisses to you

Jess, this morning: Best. Drunk text sesh. Ever.

Indeed.

This has been “Drunk Texting With Jess Manifesto.”

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4 Comments

  1. EpiphoraNo Gravatar
    Posted October 2, 2010 at 5:32 pm | Permalink

    Hahahahaa. “j jiz3: in pants just ow.” Amazing. I love how I can just barely figure out what she’s saying, but the misspellings make it 100x better.

    Reply
  2. Jess ManifestoNo Gravatar
    Posted October 2, 2010 at 6:04 pm | Permalink

    Texting you last night was clearly the best decision I’ve made in months.

    Reply
    • Britni TheVadgeWigNo Gravatar
      Posted October 2, 2010 at 7:03 pm | Permalink

      Definitely not one for http://poordecisions.net/

      Reply
  3. Mr MNo Gravatar
    Posted October 3, 2010 at 8:49 pm | Permalink

    Her texts are just brilliant.
    Reminds me of a Pogo character Grundoon. (Ooops! Showing my age!)

    Mr M

    Reply

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