Comments on: Haunting Me

By: la petite

la petite — Sun, 09 May 2010 21:38:54 +0000

I think the main thing that hurts us when we’ve been violated is that we fear that our bodies will never be sacred again; that everyone can and will hurt and/or rape us.

Its a loss of security that WILL surely fade my dear, I promise. You actually are safe and your body is sacred and still yours. We all suffer at some point or another but the most we can do is use it for the best purpose possible and use it to help us grow. Here’s comfort-hugging you from afar. <3

/la petite

By: alphafemme

alphafemme — Mon, 03 May 2010 04:21:12 +0000

I worry about that too

By: alana

alana — Sun, 02 May 2010 21:36:20 +0000

I just don’t know. Hang in there.

By: Eve

Eve — Sun, 02 May 2010 18:02:30 +0000

That sounds a lot like what I go through. I used to have nightmares about my dad, and I still get a rush of adrenaline anytime I see someone who looks like they could be him. Rape and assault scenes in movies make me feel shaky. I also feel slightly uncomfortable around men who are middle aged and have pot bellies like my dad, even if I know they’re good people (like my mom’s brother, which makes me sad).

I don’t know if it ever goes away completely, but it definitely can get better. Much better. Personally, EMDR was one of the biggest things that helped me not be triggered as easily or have as many intrusive thoughts, along with talk therapy, talking about it with my friends, and blogging about it. It takes time and work, but I think you can do it. As Beryl said, be patient with yourself, and don’t be afraid to ask for help! Also, the fact that you’re not keeping silent about it is a very big deal and shows that you have a lot of strength and courage. That’s worth being proud of!

By: Nadia West

Nadia West — Sun, 02 May 2010 14:10:19 +0000

I can relate to this so much. When I see a blond-haired man in his 40′s, I pause in fear because it makes me think of the guy who assaulted me. He’s active in sex blogger circles (less than before but still) so I come across his web presence all too often.

Hugs. Here’s to hoping these memories fade.

By: BlowJoy

BlowJoy — Sun, 02 May 2010 14:06:43 +0000

Time to talk to someone professionally, sister.

By: Complicated Kitten

Complicated Kitten — Sun, 02 May 2010 14:03:33 +0000

You have gone thru such a violent terrible experience. I pray that you find comfort and heal. After experiencing my own recent nightmare, I am enrolled this coming week in a women’s self defense class. I hope to learn a few new skills to protect myself.

By: Beryl

Beryl — Sun, 02 May 2010 12:55:35 +0000

I’m sorry. I’m sorry your peace of mind was stolen from you. I’ve been reading your blog a long time and I see a strong woman capable of taking it back. Just be patient and kind with yourself. You will when you are ready. It takes time.

xox Beryl