Comments on: Wifely Duty: Rape Culture and Marital Rape

By: Britni

Britni — Fri, 19 Feb 2010 16:21:11 +0000

Advizor, it means that it may be triggering for rape victims, i.e. may upset them, trigger flashbacks, etc.

By: Advizor

Advizor — Fri, 19 Feb 2010 02:31:02 +0000

I liked this post a great deal. Thanks.

You used a phrase I'm not familiar with, "*WARNING* CLIP MAY BE TRIGGERING*"

What does that mean?

By: Another Suburban Mom

Another Suburban Mom — Tue, 16 Feb 2010 11:55:55 +0000

I think that the whole concept of the "duty" fuck is wrong. How much fun can sex be when one person is lying there wishing it would end.

However discussions about sex and libido can be a challenging topic for the most enlightened of couples so there is a long road to hoe there.

By: The Duchess

The Duchess — Tue, 16 Feb 2010 03:08:15 +0000

This is simultaneously sad and hilarious.
Not even just from the woman's point of view. It makes men look just as bad as the women who are ignoring their "duties."

Really? Do you think most men would consider themselves heroes and that they have the right to force their wives? That they're never not in the mood when their wives are?

And anyone who could watch that scene and feel that there is any ambiguity on what happened is absolutely ridiculous. Rape is rape. Period.

By: mrs. m

mrs. m — Tue, 16 Feb 2010 01:55:39 +0000

i'm happy to know that my husband not fucking every woman that walks back him is a heroic effort.

where are the men who write with their brains rather than their cocks? not ALL men are looking to get laid every second of every waking moment.

also, i will have to remember that i was "practically abused" as a child.

sheesh, what century are we in again?

By: sarahbear

sarahbear — Mon, 15 Feb 2010 23:37:58 +0000

I have never understood why it's so difficult to recognize that situation as rape. It was pretty clear to me that's what it was and watching that clip gave me chills.

The quotes from other comments and blogs? Disgusting. I think that when men who are as pig-headed and insensitive as the ones who's blogs you quoted go on to suggest that it's a heroic feat for a man to be faithful to his wife. To suggest that all men are rabid and frothing at the mouth if they don't get the sex they deserve for merely existing. Those types of men make me sick, and I think they make -real- men sick too, because they attempt to lump all men together. Because they can't control their own impulses they want to try to say 'everyone else is doing it' to try and deflect some of the blame off of their poor choices.

Great post, Brit.

By: Sa

Sa — Mon, 15 Feb 2010 19:48:56 +0000

This was a very informative post, well-written and well-researched. I live in a country where marital rape wasn't recognized until the 90's, so this is a painful topic for me. The number of times I have heard people accuse women of sabotaging their relationships because they refused to "lie down and think of England" is revolting.