Comments on: Innocent Victims: The Effects of Domestic Violence on Children, Part II http://britisshameless.com/2009/10/innocent-victims-the-effects-of-domestic-violence-on-children-part-ii/ I'm nothing but a brash and impetuous girl striving to be true to myself while searching for somewhere to belong, someone to love, and a better version of me. Fri, 19 Nov 2010 02:54:12 +0000 hourly 1 By: Another Suburban Mom http://britisshameless.com/2009/10/innocent-victims-the-effects-of-domestic-violence-on-children-part-ii/comment-page-1/#comment-5616 Another Suburban Mom Fri, 30 Oct 2009 10:32:16 +0000 http://britisshameless.com/?p=955#comment-5616 Thank you for writing this whole series. It was informative and heart breaking. Thank you for writing this whole series. It was informative and heart breaking.

]]> By: Eve http://britisshameless.com/2009/10/innocent-victims-the-effects-of-domestic-violence-on-children-part-ii/comment-page-1/#comment-5614 Eve Fri, 30 Oct 2009 08:02:28 +0000 http://britisshameless.com/?p=955#comment-5614 Oh, man. Like Part 1, this post had a lot of my childhood in it. After reading this, I can see that I suddenly began showing extreme signs of childhood depression when my father's behavior grew more abusive (when I was about 11). I also recognized in my own life growing up several things on the list of things children learn from abuse. Particularly "People that love you get to abuse you.", "Adults are inconsistent in their attitudes and feelings towards each other.", (a frequent saying in my home was "Dad is nothing if not inconsistent") and "A child's needs are unimportant." (my father's usual response to my protests against his inconsistent and illogical rules was "I'm the parent and you're the child, so it doesn't matter if it's not fair/doesn't make sense"). Also, the bit about eating problems jumps out at me. My younger brother, the only person in my family who was battered by my father, had extreme eating problems through most of his childhood through early adolescence, leading to serious digestive problems for years and requiring regular interventions by a gastroenterologist. In the 6 years since we stopped living with my dad, his eating habits have become less extreme, but he has yet to actually take good care of himself.<br /><br />Your post was very informative, and brought to my attention many things that I am beginning to recognize as abusive behaviors by my father, which I haven't examined or acknowledged as much as the sexual abused I suffered as a child. Again, thank you. This series is very important. Oh, man. Like Part 1, this post had a lot of my childhood in it. After reading this, I can see that I suddenly began showing extreme signs of childhood depression when my father's behavior grew more abusive (when I was about 11). I also recognized in my own life growing up several things on the list of things children learn from abuse. Particularly "People that love you get to abuse you.", "Adults are inconsistent in their attitudes and feelings towards each other.", (a frequent saying in my home was "Dad is nothing if not inconsistent") and "A child's needs are unimportant." (my father's usual response to my protests against his inconsistent and illogical rules was "I'm the parent and you're the child, so it doesn't matter if it's not fair/doesn't make sense"). Also, the bit about eating problems jumps out at me. My younger brother, the only person in my family who was battered by my father, had extreme eating problems through most of his childhood through early adolescence, leading to serious digestive problems for years and requiring regular interventions by a gastroenterologist. In the 6 years since we stopped living with my dad, his eating habits have become less extreme, but he has yet to actually take good care of himself.

Your post was very informative, and brought to my attention many things that I am beginning to recognize as abusive behaviors by my father, which I haven't examined or acknowledged as much as the sexual abused I suffered as a child. Again, thank you. This series is very important.

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